Welcome to The Love Weavers' blog. If unfamiliar with the blog and its authors, scroll down.
Howdy
and salutations, my name is A.B. Thomas. Sometimes I write what some call
erotica, while others call it smut; really it doesn’t matter to me what a
person calls it because it’s just writing out fantasy anyway. Sometimes I
write the first person because I’m a
visual writer – I see it in my head, and
that’s how it comes out in written form. As a result of this, on
occasion, women, who I suspect have had nipped into the wine coolers just a wee
bit too much before reading the stories, have a tendency to confuse the writing
with the man. To clear this up, I thought I should provide what I imagine would be a
realistic encounter:
I am sitting at the bar, and you walk in; our eyes lock. You’re horny, and I fit the bill of the kind of man
that will fit your needs…plus the fact that it’s only ten in the morning and
I’m the only one there who doesn’t have their teeth sitting beside them while they're sipping their draft through a straw.
You sit down, and we chat, and you soon realize that I’m perfect for
a sexual encounter as you’ve ascertained that I could not possibly find you
again if you left me on the corner afterward.
We sidle out of the bar hand in
hand, and you whisper in my ear admitting
that you have read my stories and you want to act them out. I nod and smile and
say we have to make a stop at the supermarket to get some supplies. You’re
embarrassed to be seen with me, so you
wait outside while I go in and grab them. I come out twenty minutes later with two large bags. You ask why and I tell you
seductively, “it was $1.49 day, baby, it was $1.49 day.”
We get to a motel and get a
room. We go into the room, and I set the
bags by the door, and you give me a quick
kiss and say:
You:
Ok baby let’s get undressed and fu… (you step back and look down)….what’s
wrong with the front of your pants? Did you just…Oh, come on!
We play a might nice round of
old maid, all the while you are commenting on that it’s ironic to be playing a
game that is named after what you’ll be once you actually get me out of my
pants.
You:
Ding ding! Twenty minutes, get undressed and let’s get busy….uh, why are you
looking at me like that?
We sit back down and start
playing war, you get a little violent with the cards with each passing moment.
Another forty minutes pass, and your
heart quickens...
You: (To motivate me properly you undress
– quickly) Alright, twenty minutes are up now, let’s f…just give me all you’ve got,
baby! (The
look of lust fades from your face to one of slight irritation) What are you
doing?
Me: (Emptying my pockets) Well, I’ve
got a couple of pens, here’s my money clip, some change, Hey! I was wondering
where my beef jerky went!
You:
how could you have ever been a gutter slut? There can’t be that many women who could deal with
this shit…
You:
You’re like a scab…you know you shouldn’t touch it,
but somehow your finger starts just scratching around the edges...
Oh
my God! Is that foreskin?
Me:
What’s the big deal, anyway? If you think about it, your lips should be called
the foreskin of the tongue.
Me:
And besides, look, now you see it…now you don’t…now you see it…now you
don’t…now you see it..uh oh…
Me: ( I lean real close and lift up my
arm) It’s me…I stuck a pickled egg under my arm to give me that ‘eat me’
smell…
You:
God damn it, why didn’t I just buy the damn batteries? Ok, ok, I can do this….listen, you little shit, I want to do it just
like the damn story…
Me: Well, when you sent me into the
store to get some lube, I was looking at the price. Then I saw there was a
special on bacon and I was feeling a little hungry so I thought I could kill
two birds with one stone…why are you looking at me like that and putting your
clothes back on? bacon grease is
natural. Sure, it might be a little scalding at first,
but I figure since you said you wanted it hot and heavy and that the
cholesterol would definitely make it heavy…where you going?
ABOUT THE BLOG
Who are we? The Love Weavers are a bunch of writers. We all write for Extasy Books and/or Devine Destinies and a lot of us write in other places as well. We write in multiple genres for general and adult readership. Many of our books are love stories of some kind or another, and we enjoy looking at love in all its wonderful variety.
The
purpose of this blog is to tell our readers something about our craft,
our passion for stories, how we build our worlds, what characters we
choose and why, how we use clothing, food, music, weather, colour,
themes, symbolism, history, science, and (okay) love to bring these
stories to life.
Some of our posts are suitable for general readers.
These will have a big G at the top. (G)
Some are in between.
These may have a big PG13 at the top. (PG13)
Some of our posts are suitable for adults only.
These will have a big AO at the top. (AO)
Welcome to The Love Weavers' blog. We can't wait to share the love.
Man time! Love it.
ReplyDeletehaha thats funny...and good
ReplyDelete